I have to confess, I’ve been at the parenting books again. This time it’s Siblings Without Rivalry, which is (in my best cheesy DJ voice) an oldie but goldie. As is usual with these books, I reach the end feeling equal parts dismayed (I do everything wrong) and encouraged (everyone else’s kids are a nightmare too, yay!).

If I had a chime for every alarm bell that went off in my head while reading, I’d have a flippin’ Grandfather clock by now: don’t give attention to the aggressor, don’t take sides, don’t just shout at them to stop, don’t intervene all the time, don’t pigeon-hole the kids into roles, and never, never compare your children.

That’s a lot to remember when they’ve got each other in a headlock, but I’d dismiss it if I didn’t feel it to be entirely true. Especially the last point: comparison.